Fried Green Tomatillos

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Magic in the Moonlight

Originally uploaded by Tasji
"So much to say. And so much not to say! Some things are better left unsaid. But so many unsaid things can become a burden." V. M. Axline.

I talk a lot. To anyone who listens. I blog (at the moment on three, soon to be four blogs), I write to myself and others, always trying to keep up with my e-mails and constantly falling behind. I assume people feel neglected, like I don't have time for them. Not true. There are just so many things to say right now that I try to channel more time into the more important things. Trivial and frivolous moments have been left in the dark in the last month, and will continue to be for the next one.

However, although this is a full weekend of work I am going to demand that I take at least an hour each day of this lengthened weekend to do something leaking frivolity. After my paying job today I'm leaving for the Mountains in which I will be pressed against my technological workbench, doing web and graphic design, and possibly some Ad copy. At least I have a monster group of machines to help me with this and I'm surrounded by a fantasy of Nature's best stuff.

And I will take advantage of that momentarily luscious (soon to be dry, brown and dead) world and take some time for myself. Tonight I'm going to break out the telescope and if it's a clear night, do some long-exposure photos. Tomorrow I'm going to paint and hike to the observatory. Sunday I'm going to shoot film with the pentax and possibly record some music in the studio. Depending on the heat there might be an adventure to go get some pie and apple cider in Julian (YES!) Monday is rock-climbing.

I decided to write down these goals, to make these commitments on the blog, with the promises of posting the results so I am accountable to do these things and take time to make my soul happy while I work to make others happy.

As the time draws closer for me to leave home I feel people slipping away. I hope that I am not overloading myself with work to distance myself and ease into a new life. It is possible, I am defensive, and though open, I am private. I suppose I will say, because it needs to be said and put out in the universe, that I have not forgotten anyone. There is no ignoring and I will try to commit more time for the social things being 24 has to offer.

It surprises me how easily offended people get by silence, when often they would rather not hear the truth in the first place.


mr.lady said...

These sound like excellent goals. Where are you moving too? I had no idea!

May 23, 2009 at 1:26 AM  
Natasja said...

Did I ever tell you Portland? Eh, sometimes I don't see these comment things.

June 30, 2009 at 11:19 AM  

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